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John Canine
Human Dog
Possible Anti-Christ

First Show Appearance: To Mock a Killing Bird
Played by: Nick Crawford

John was conceived under a harvest moon by the joining of a man, Tim Canine, and a dog, Janet into a heretical and pagan drug/alcohol fueled sexual ritual. John attended Donner High School where he lettered in treeing and rummaging. John Canine holds a degree in botany and well watching from Indiana's Purdue University. His college roommate was none other than Super Bowl MVP Drew Brees and they have a friendship that lasts to this day. Drew Brees after Super Bowl XLIV had this to say about his long time friend:
I want to thank the City of New Orleans, the guys on the team, my wife and young tousled headed child as well as John Canine - a more loyal friend you could not find... naw, not in a million years of friends.
Canine lost his recent bid to become King of Dog Island when partner Milton McGregor dropped funding for said island.